Vegeta (To the tune of EMINEM's 'Stan') By: ??????

Warning: There is some profanity in this fan song thing. Read with care!

Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs   The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall  What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Dear Shenlon, I wrote you but you still ain’t callin’ I left my planet, my race and my corporation at the bottom I sent two dragonballs back in autumn You must not have got ‘em That little green bastard Dende must’ve got lost or somethin’ Sometimes I drop em accidentally and crack em But anyways, fuck it. What’s bin up man, how’s the other dragons? My girlfriend’s pregnant; I’m out to be a father If I have a daughter guess what I have to call her, I have to name her Bra, see? I heard about Kami too, I’m sorry I know the guy wanted to kill Garlik Jr and beat ‘im I know you probably hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan I even learnt some Namek, that shit is hard! I got a room full of your stuff and some scouters, man I like the shit you did in the Freeza Saga, that shit was bad! Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to chat Truly yours, the strongest creature, this is Vegeta.   Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Dear Shen, you still ain’t called or wrote, I hope you have the chance I ain’t mad, I just want to ‘Big Bang’ your ass! If you didn’t want to talk to me on Namek, you didn’t have to But you could’ve granted my wish – It was just a small one One for immortality: to be infinite years old I stood there in the blistering cold and you just didn’t perform That’s pretty shitty man. That’s downright evil I could’ve beaten Freeza, but instead it was that Goku I’m not mad, I just don’t like what you had to do Remember when we met? You said if I called upon you You’d grant my wish. See I’m like you in a way I never had a family neither Although no one summons me just to wish for crap I can relate to your hard life, I even wrote a song So when I have a shitty day, I drift away and sing ‘Shenlon’ Coz I don’t got shit else, so that shit helps when I’m depressed I even got a shirt with Shenlon writ across the chest Sometimes I paint myself green, to see how cool it is Its like adrenaline, the colour is better than pink y’see Everything I wish becomes real which is like heaven The girlfriend’s jealous coz I talk about you 24/7 But she don’t know you like I know you Shenlon, no one does She don’t know what it was like for me growing up You gotta see me man, I’ll be the meanest master you’ll ever lose Sincerely yours, Vegeta. PS We should get together too   Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Dear Mr ‘I’m too good to write to or find my fans'  This’ll be the last message I ever send your ass It been six months and still no word, though I deserve it I know you got the last dragonball coz I zapped Dende stupid So this is my cassette I’m sending you, I hope you hear it I’m in my space pod right now; I’m doing the speed of light Hey Shenlon, I drank Mrs Briefs’ tea, ya dare me to drive? You know that song from the series: ‘Rocking the dragon’ About dancing and all that other shite And collecting dragonballs That’s what ima do but I’ll rock you to death It’s too late, I’m closing in on you, I’m SSJ All I wanted was a lousy letter and a wish I hope you know I zapped half of your Nameks I love you Shenlon; we could’ve gotten along think about it You ruined it now I hope you can’t sleep and you panic about me And when you panic I hope you lie awake and worry bout me I hope when I get there I kick your ass and you can’t leave without me See Shenlon, shut up Kakkarotto, I’m trying to talk Hey Shenlon, that’s my rival pigging out in the back I want him powered up ready to fight you Coz I don’t want him to miss out on all the action Well here I am, by all seven dragonballs Oh shit I forgot, how am I supposed to summon you?   Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Oh King Kold, I wonder why…I don’t use those dragonballs The earthling rain clouds up the window, and I can’t seem to recall What happened, oh so long ago, but thanks to the dragonballs They’ll grant me and I’ll be bad, I’ll be bad   Dear Vegeta, I meant to write you sooner but I’ve just been busy You said Bulma’s pregnant now, how far along is she? How are the other Saiya-jins? Is Yajarobi still fat? And here’s an autograph; I wrote it on your dragonball I’m sorry I had to go, Guru died unexpectedly Don’t think I did that to you man, intentionally And what’s this about you painting yourself green Mine is natural, you fucked up little freak! You got some problems, I think you need some help To stop you from killing anyone else And what’s this about you and me together That type of shit’ll make your friends have to wish you mentally better I really think you and Bulma need each other Or maybe you should learn to say her name I just hope you learn the love game I hope this reaches you in time Before you hurt someone, I think that you’ll be fine If you get some Valium in you, but Vegeta Why do you get so mad, try to understand, I do want you as a wisher I just don’t want you to wish some crazy shit I can see this one ship headed towards me, it makes me sick This dude is cruising towards me, probably wants a fight And there’s some one with him, uh oh! He looks bigger than the other I should run away. I want my mother!   Hang on a mo, oh shit! It’s you! DAMN!

REAL LYRICS

STAN by: EMINEM

Album: Marshall Mathers LP CHORUS: My tea's gone cold,I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all the morning rain clouds up my window and I can't see at all And even if I could it'd all be grey, but your picture on my wall it reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad My tea's gone cold,I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all the morning rain clouds up my window and I can't see at all And even if I could it'd all be grey, but your picture on my wall it reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad VERSE 1: Dear Slim, I wrote you but you still ain't callin' I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn You must not have got 'em It probably was a problem at the post office or somethin' Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em But anyways, fuck it, what's been up man, how's your daughter? My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm out to be a father If I have a daughter, guess what I'm-a call her? I'm-a name her Bonnie. I read about your uncle Ronnie too, I'm sorry I had a friend kill himself over some bitch who didn't want him. I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan. I even got the underground shit that you did with ScamZ. I got a room full of your posters and your pictures, man. I like the shit you did with Ruckus too, that shit was fat. Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to chat Truly yours, your biggest fan, this is Stan. CHORUS: My tea's gone cold,I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all the morning rain clouds up my window and I can't see at all And even if I could it'd all be grey, but your picture on my wall it reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad VERSE 2: Dear Slim, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have the chance. I ain't mad, I just think it's fucked up you don't answer fans. If you didn't want to talk to me outside your concert You didn't have to but you could have signed an autograph for Matthew. That's my little brother, man. He's only 6 years old. We waited in the blistering cold for you for 4 hours and ya just said no. That's pretty shitty man, you're like his fuckin' idol He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do. I ain't that mad, but I just don't like bein' lied to. Remember when we met in Denver, you said if I write you You would write back. See, I'm just like you in a way. I never knew my father neither. He used to always cheat on my mom and beat her. I can relate to what you're sayin' in your songs. So when I have a shitty day, I drift away and put 'em on. Cause I don't really got shit else, so that shit helps when I'm depressed. I even got a tattoo with your name across the chest. Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds. It's like adrenaline. The Pain is such a sudden rush for me. See, everything you say is real, and I respect you 'cause you tell it. My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7. But she don't know you like I know you, Slim, no one does. She don't know what it was like for people like us growing up. You've gotta call me man. I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose. Sincerely yours, Stan. PS: We should be together too. CHORUS: My tea's gone cold,I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all the morning rain clouds up my window and I can't see at all And even if I could it'd all be grey, but your picture on my wall it reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad VERSE 3: Dear Mr. "I'm too good to call or write my fans" This'll be the last package I ever send your ass. It's been six months and still no word. I don't deserve it? I know you got my last two letters, I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect. So this is my cassette I'm sending you. I hope you hear it. I'm in the car right now. I'm doing 90 on the freeway. Hey Slim, "I drank a fifth of vodka, ya dare me to drive?" You know that song by Phil Collins from "The Air In The Night"? About that guy who could have saved that other guy from drowning? But didn't? Then Phil saw it all then at his show he found him? That's kinda how this is. You could have rescued me from drowning. Now it's too late. I'm on a thousand downers now, I'm drowsy. And all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call. I hope you know I ripped all o' your pictures off the wall. I love you Slim, we could have been together. Think about it. You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it. And when you dream, I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it. I hope your conscious eats at you and you can't breathe without me. See Slim, {screaming} shut up bitch, I'm trying to talk Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screaming in the trunk. But I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you. 'Cause if she suffocates, she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too. Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now. Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this shit out? {screeching tires, crashing sounds, car splashes into the water} VERSE 4: Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner, but I've just been busy. You said your girlfriend's pregnant now, how far along is she? Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that. And here's an autograph for your brother: I wrote it on your Starter cap. I'm sorry I didn't see you at the show, I must have missed you. Don't think I did that shit intentionally, just to diss you. And what's this shit you said about you like to cut your wrists too? I say that shit just clownin' dawg, c'mon, how fucked up is you? You got some issues, Stan, I think you need some counselin' To help your ass from bouncin' off the walls when you get down some. And what's this shit about us meant to be together? That type of shit'll make me not want us to meet each other. I really think you and your girlfriend need each other. Or maybe you just need to treat her better. I hope you get to read this letter. I just hope it reaches you in time. Before you hurt yourself, I think that you'd be doin' just fine If you'd relax a little. I'm glad that I inspire you, but Stan Why are you so mad? Try to understand that I do want you as a fan. I just don't want you to do some crazy shit. I seen this one shit on the news a couple weeks ago that made me sick. Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge And had his girlfriend in the trunk and she was pregnant with his kid And in the car they found a tape but it didn't say who it was to Come to think about it...his name was...it was you. DAMN!

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